The McSwindle
As I was going to St. Ives,
I met a scheme with seven lies.
Each lie had seven poetry prizes,
In seven different new disguises.
Each disguise drew seven hundred hopefuls,
They sent fees and poems by the boatfuls.
I met a scheme with seven lies.
Each lie had seven poetry prizes,
In seven different new disguises.
Each disguise drew seven hundred hopefuls,
They sent fees and poems by the boatfuls.
Poems, hopefuls, prizes, lies –
How many were published at St. Ives?
How many were published at St. Ives?
One.
________________
Hieronymus Bosch’s The Conjurer: The Frog, the Dog, and the Owl
What’s with the owl in the basket? Why is the conjurer’s mark vomiting a frog? What’s on the table?
This is a painting with an amazing story. If you would like to read a description of what is going on and how it is interpreted, go to
Illusion and Deception: Construction of a Proverb in Hieronymus Bosch’s The Conjurer, by Elina Gertsman (Click PDF for a download.)
If you want to read about the story of how it’s a copy, how it was stolen, and where it is, and why you will be very unlikely ever to see it, go here.
The McSwindle – written in response to Deanna’s Mother Goose Muse Challenge: “Use a nursery rhyme as inspiration for an original poem” via The Skeptics Kaddish. Go here to find out more and join in.
Josie, I love how you turned the famous St. Ives riddle into a clever satire about poetry contest scams, and that final answer of “One” lands with a perfectly sharp wink! 😉
~David
hi, Josie❣️
Just wanna let you know that this week’s W3, hosted by our beloved Artie, is now live until Monday:
https://skepticskaddish.com/2026/06/10/w3-prompt-215-weave-written-weekly/
Much love,
David
Yes, I saw that. But, as always – thanks for the reminder. Not sure I’m up to that one. Perhaps lightning will strike.
And thanks for the generous comment on my pet McSwindle peeve. Cheers to you David.
just make sure to stay safe if it does! 🤡
No need to worry. As you can see from my latest (Tasting Notes) post, I am fully insulated against all attacks from the cosmos. My social media output ensures that. But the “poetry” on the spice label jars is something to behold! Who needs poetry when you have condiment copywriters on the job?
Great take!
💞Suzanne
Thanks, Suzanne!
Cheers!
Excellent! It is the same in the art world – you pay a fee to just be considered for the show and when rejected they keep your money… It seems a scam!
It is a scam. It’s a grift that exploits ordinary people and their hopes and their work.
I would be happy to explain more should you be interested. (I could even do it in verse!)
Josie, I’m completely aware of the grift. For a juried art show, you have to pay to play and even then it doesn’t mean you will even be given consideration. Some of the shows have “purchase prizes” which means they can get your art at bargain basement prices! A friend made a bronze statue ($700 in just materials and cost of casting) and the Purchase Prize was $500. She made sure she indicated that her piece was NFS (not for sale)… Otherwise it surely would have “won”!
That sounds egregious. I hope she found somewhere legitimate to show and sell her work.
This was legit! It was the Midwestern Museum of American Art!! Even the good places are a scam when it comes to art!
That’s a bit shocking. I think many of us have a little understanding of how the foetry world operates –
(“send us $25 and we’ll review your work and the winner will get a prize and a publication” – you know the kind of corrupt grift that exploits earnest people who don’t know it’s all an insider-trading scam)
– but sad to know it extends into the art world too.
This is an excellent commentary on the more nefarious practices in the literary world. Well done
Thank you, Kim. I hope people don’t read it as a criticism of all those who love language and just want to be seen and heard.